What about Emotional Issues-pre op

[BHRfootballer]

Good afternoon all,
First some information about myself;
I'm Stuart Robertson a 44 years old Scottish male currently living in the south East of England for my sins.( that's another story)

Awaiting my Resurfacing operation on march 25th 2010.

A family Man -Lisa my other half for the past 18 & half years ( still not married, not for the want of trying) We have two Beautiful children; Conna 8yrs (soon to be 9yrs old on the 24th of March) And Aimee 7yrs old.

I'm an ex footballer ( soccer player to you Americans) and played at a good standard.

Reason for adding this topic to the "Emotional Issues after op" was simply the word EMOTION - I started to well up, i finally found somewhere i could relate to others in the same positions, so i thought. I've yet to come across others with the same feelings as i do ( i must be really messed up if i'm the only person feeling this way)

I'm not known for showing my emotions but when i do i let go; I really feel the need to vent my frustration/ anger/ hurt / what ever you call this horrible depressing feeling, i've been beside myself for almost three years taking numerous doses of medication which frankly is messing my body up big time.
I was informed i had a muscular problem in April 2007 only to be told last November 2009 i was desperately in need of a "Total Hip Replacement" by a soon to be retiring Surgeon.

Thankfully i'm now under a surgeon who is the only person able to perform the Birmingham Hip Resurfacing operation in this area of the country and has a fantastic rate of success (at least that's what i've been told). Rather than having a Total hip replacement.
I have a great relationship with my partner but am unable to express myself to her about the way i currently feel, i also don't have any immediate family to fall back on for support - emotional support that is.

So how the hell does anyone get through day to day life with out negative thoughts bursting into the mind playing out disastrous outcomes pre & post operation. I've lost 4 stone since last November and almost continually have bad dreams circulating around my imminent operation...... i feel numb,  desperate for my life to be back on track to have the ability to do the simplest of things like tying up my LEFT shoes lace without wanting to burst into tears- i feel sick to the stomach at not being able to play football with my son or helping my daughter ride the bloody bike that currently sits outside under a cover hardly ever used , i'm not there to catch her fall because i can't keep up!!!!

Look i'm really sorry about babbling away here..... if there is anyone out there with some words of encouragement i'll happily sit and read your replies, I've read loads of positive post op stories and they fill me with longing to compete in a game of football ,playing a round of golf walking to the 19th hole and sinking a long cold one and even doing the London marathon before i'm 50 (  bucket list number 5)

I'm amazed and in awe of you all, hoping i'll be sitting here one day replying to a letter just like this one with bags of positive feed back nurturing the thought of a Positive Mental Attitude; I just wish i could practice what i preach at work.

Regards

Stuart 

 

[stevel]

Hi Stuart,

You are half way there to your journey towards pain relief and a return to an active lifestyle.  You found this website and found an experienced hip resurfacing surgeon so the chances of success are high.  Follow the post-op obstructions and don't worry about itching, swelling, rashes, clicking and clunking on your road to recovery.  Unlike the characters in "Bucket List," hip resurfacing surgery is not terminal cancer and you should have many years towards the end of your days to enjoy your new hip.
Yes, the bad hip consumes your emotions before surgery and for at least six months after surgery during the rehabilitation period.  But your hip will be improving and for me at 1 year 5 months post-op, I don't think about it - I just go skiing all over the mountain - as I will today.  I am elated and have told fellow skiiers that I feel as if I've been reborn.  So keep thinking those positive thoughts!
The negative thoughts drain your psyche and for those around you.

[BHRfootballer]

 REF: " Bucket List"

My Bucket list is a Just that!  a " List " of things to do before i'm returned to mother earth, Nothing to do with dying on the op table, sorry if i gave that impression.

[dmather]

Hi Stuart,

I am sure I am like tons of others on here and after a dozen years or so of dealing with two deteriorating hips I can say depression has crept into the equation for sure. I am 18 days away from my first resurfacing and I do have mixed emotions, but ultimately I am working to overcome any of the negative feelings by focusing on the pssibility of being able to do even simple things, like getting out of bed pain free, again. If I can get back to being physically active once again, well that will be a great bonus.

So I guess my input is simply to focus on the positives of a successful outcome has much as possible. That is what I am doing and I find myself becoming more excited about the prospects every day.

Good luck!

[Josephine18]

Hi Stuart,

Rest assured you are not alone in your feelings regarding your hip and your upcoming surgery!  Many of us here who have had a HRS have been in your shoes.  The frustration of not being able to do even the simplest of tasks like tying your shoe without pain and the anxieties of having to undergo surgery are surely enough to make anyone feel the way you do.  Think though about all the right things you have done up to this point.  You sought out an experienced surgeon and learned about hip resurfacing making an informed decision to improve the quality of life.  You sought out support from this community from all of us that have been where you are when you could not find that in other areas of your life.  You expressed your emotions regarding your anxieties and negative thoughts instead of letting them fester inside of you causing even more stress to you and your loved ones.   You have done a lot of right things and seem to making good decisions.  It is easier said than done when it comes to thinking positive thoughts.  Instead of concentrating on all the things that can go wrong though, you need to focus and visualize on all that can go right.  It takes no more of your emotional energy to concentrate on the positive than on the negative, so you may as well focus on the good.  We choose what we want to focus on – the positive or negative channel that plays in our heads.  Don’t let your focus stay on that negative channel.  When those thoughts creep in, use you “remote” to change the channel.  Put that vision of you playing with your kids, running around the football field, being able to tie your shoes without pain and without a second thought, in your mind and let those become your focus.    

After your surgery, don’t get down if your recovery does not go as quickly as you would like or thought it would.  Many here have had fantastically quick recoveries.  My recovery was much slower though, and I did get down initially because it seemed like I was not recovering as well as everyone else here.  I came to accept that all recover differently, and that I needed time to let my body heal in a way that was best for it.  I had to remember that I had a major operation and that one or two more weeks or months was not too long when I put into perspective of the rest of my life.  Be patient with yourself.  Even though you may not sense it, as long as you keep your recovery a priority, you will grow stronger each day.

Remember too that as your surgery date approaches, that you are closer than you think to having your life back pain-free playing with your kids and doing those things that enhance the quality of your life.  Keep in touch and let us know how everything is going!  This is great community here full of support and advice from people who have been where you are and where you will be.  Just remember, you are closer than you think!

[Tekka]

Stuart Mate,

I felt many of the feelings you describe. It is a roller coaster of emotions but the end result is worth it.

Stuart, you must find out as much as you can about your surgeon, do not leave it to "what you have been told", use the resource on this site and create yourself a checklist.

This is a technical operation, you do not want a novice performing your op mate, the UK is small place, if you have to travel to get the best then that is what you should do.

Best wishes

Terry

[obxpelican]

Stuart,

I just read your story and it's not unlike many people, when you find out you need a new hip you go from disbelief, denial, anger and then sometimes you get downright frustrated to the point of depression. 

What you need to understand is that hip resurfacing if done by an experienced hip surgeon is safe and very effective for the relief of pain.  Most of the issues you read about occur < 1% of the time.  You certainly raise your odds by going with experience.  Even in the case of issues with hip surgery the problems are usually fixed the next surgery without any long term problems.

Make sure that somehow your meds are not causing some form of depression, we have a good friend who is going to get his knees done and he is the most depressed man I've ever met and he's usually someone who is very positive and easy going.  His problem is he's spending too much time laying around and he is been taking pain meds for too long.

Being in your position you probably feel lonely and you think you are the only one going through this, read some of Pat's recovery stories they will cheer you up.

Good luck

Chuck

Good afternoon all,
First some information about myself;
I'm Stuart Robertson a 44 years old Scottish male currently living in the south East of England for my sins.( that's another story)

Awaiting my Resurfacing operation on march 25th 2010.

A family Man -Lisa my other half for the past 18 & half years ( still not married, not for the want of trying) We have two Beautiful children; Conna 8yrs (soon to be 9yrs old on the 24th of March) And Aimee 7yrs old.

I'm an ex footballer ( soccer player to you Americans) and played at a good standard.

Reason for adding this topic to the "Emotional Issues after op" was simply the word EMOTION - I started to well up, i finally found somewhere i could relate to others in the same positions, so i thought. I've yet to come across others with the same feelings as i do ( i must be really messed up if i'm the only person feeling this way)

I'm not known for showing my emotions but when i do i let go; I really feel the need to vent my frustration/ anger/ hurt / what ever you call this horrible depressing feeling, i've been beside myself for almost three years taking numerous doses of medication which frankly is messing my body up big time.
I was informed i had a muscular problem in April 2007 only to be told last November 2009 i was desperately in need of a "Total Hip Replacement" by a soon to be retiring Surgeon.

Thankfully i'm now under a surgeon who is the only person able to perform the Birmingham Hip Resurfacing operation in this area of the country and has a fantastic rate of success (at least that's what i've been told). Rather than having a Total hip replacement.
I have a great relationship with my partner but am unable to express myself to her about the way i currently feel, i also don't have any immediate family to fall back on for support - emotional support that is.

So how the hell does anyone get through day to day life with out negative thoughts bursting into the mind playing out disastrous outcomes pre & post operation. I've lost 4 stone since last November and almost continually have bad dreams circulating around my imminent operation...... i feel numb,  desperate for my life to be back on track to have the ability to do the simplest of things like tying up my LEFT shoes lace without wanting to burst into tears- i feel sick to the stomach at not being able to play football with my son or helping my daughter ride the bloody bike that currently sits outside under a cover hardly ever used , i'm not there to catch her fall because i can't keep up!!!!

Look i'm really sorry about babbling away here..... if there is anyone out there with some words of encouragement i'll happily sit and read your replies, I've read loads of positive post op stories and they fill me with longing to compete in a game of football ,playing a round of golf walking to the 19th hole and sinking a long cold one and even doing the London marathon before i'm 50 (  bucket list number 5)

I'm amazed and in awe of you all, hoping i'll be sitting here one day replying to a letter just like this one with bags of positive feed back nurturing the thought of a Positive Mental Attitude; I just wish i could practice what i preach at work.

Regards

Stuart 

 

[Pat Walter]

Hi Stuart

Welcome to Hip Talk.  I think you will find some people here that understand how you feel since many have been thru it.  We all are upset that we have bad hips, pain and our lives have been put on hold.  Fortunately, we finally decide we have had enough and search for an answers.  Since you are here, you have found an answer.  Be glad you found out about hip resurfacing.  You are young at 44 and just don't need anything less than a resurfacing if you are a candidate.  Sounds like you are and will soon be telling us about your surgery experience.

Now is the time to start concentrating on what you want to do when you are healed. Stop living in the past and living with anger and regret.  You have taken the step to change you life and it will change - just read the hundreds of stories I have posted on the website.

Being angry, upset and nervous is just wasting your time.  Now you need to center your thoughts and energy towards getting a new hip and being out of pain. Everyone is nervous, but the best thing to do is to read the great sucessful stories.  Watch the videos.

Also know many people travel to Belgium or India alone to have their surgeries.  YOu can see their stories.  They did not have anyone to support them and help.  Sometimes we just have to be our own best friend.  Maybe you need to talk to someone like a counsler or clergy about your feelings of negativity or fear.  It helps to let it all go.  You are welcome to do that here too, except we are not in the same room with you.  We have all been thru it, so we do understand your feelings.  I think yours are worse since you are younger. You are just angry that life has dealt you a bad hand or maybe hip!  Just be glad there is a good solution.  If this was 100 years ago - you would sit in pain in a chair and do nothing for the rest of your life.  Be thankful for what you have and the solution available to you.

Time to change your thinking - start to make a list mentally or physically about what you are going to do this summer.  Make plans.  You will be active and out of pain.  Don't let the very few negative stories worry you.  Very few people actually have problems with their hip resurfacings.  You can read the national registries to see that.  I am not going to quote them here - you can read them.  It is best to read the hundreds of great stories about people back to living great active lives.

Stay in touch. Stay positive - dream of the wonderful summer you are going to have.

Pat

[nysoccermom]

Hi Stuart,

I can relate - chronic pain can be a lonely, depressing condition to be in. You've already taken the first step to get yourself out of it by scheduling your surgery. Background - I am 39, played some college soccer, have two active boys 9 and 12, and had a bilateral resurfacing 11/12/09. I was often discouraged over not being able to participate in my kids' activities as well, feeling that I was missing out on their childhood. However, once I had scheduled my surgery, I started saying to them, "next year I will be able to...", instead of "I'm sorry, I just can't". It was hard to imagine that I would actually be able to do those things, but just the hope that I might be able to as a result of the surgery kept me going. And I must say, they were very good about the whole thing and pretty proud of themselves when they were able to help me out after surgery. So while I was worried about them "missing out" when I couldn't play with them the way I wanted to, I think they benefited in different ways from the experience. While I'm not yet where I want to be, I am looking forward to this summer when I am confident that I will be able to get out on the tennis court and golf course and keep up with them.

One thing that may help and was suggested to me by someone on this site - the book and CD "Prepare for Surgery, Heal Faster" by Peggy Huddleston (available on amazon.com). It is labeled "A Guide of Mind-Body Techniques" and being a practical accountant, I was skeptical. However, it helped me to relax and feel calmer about my upcoming surgery and to focus on positive outcomes, both short and long-term. Hard to describe really but well worth it for me.

Hang in there, March 25th will come and go and you will be well on your way to recovery before you know it.

Wishing you the best,
Melanie

[saa115]

Stuart,

I understand what you are going through.  I'm 36 with a 9month old son at home and am scheduled for a LH resurfacing on Wed. March 2nd with Dr. Mont in Baltimore.  I hurt my hip playing basketball 10 years ago and have been trying physical therapy, home excercises, Gluco&Chondroitin, as well as nearly 2000mg of ibuprofen daily for the last year.  The last few days have been a real emotional roller coaster.  I started to second guess my decision to have the surgery now, with questions like "Did i research this enough?"; "What if X, Y or Z goes wrong?"; "Could I have done more to prolong the need for surgery?"; etc.  While Dr. Mont's team has been very accomodating, and my wife very supportive, I too have felt a bit lonely through this ordeal.  I keep reading the positive testimonials, but then gravitate back to the posts describing all kinds of complications.  It has been nerve racking.  I have felt very vulnerable at times, at other times empowered by the thought of having much of my LH motion back without pain.  Much of the problem, I find, is the uncertainty of it all and all the "what if's" that creep into my head.  In other words, I'm right there with you, Stuart. 

I'm usually a positive person, but this has tested my resolve on more than one occaision.  There's no turning back now, so I'm ready to head up to Baltimore and move on to a better stage of my life.  I've needed a real boost these last couple of days and just knowing there's someone out there who is having similar feelings, i guess, makes me feel better.  So know that I'll be heading down this path on Wed with a positive attitude.   I hope you do the same.  I'll keep you posted as to how things turn out. 

[stevel]

Stuart,

No, you didn't imply you might die on the operating table.  The film "The Bucket List" starred Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman, who knowing that they had terminal cancer, traveled the world doing things on their wish list.  This discussion group is dominated by people posting their problems and complications with hip resurfacing.  I can understand your anxiety.  Somebody posted a complication with hip resurfacing by Dr. Su just a few weeks before my scheduled surgery.  I proceeded with the surgery anyway.  Since your are in the UK, going to the absolute best and most experienced surgeons such as Mr. McMinn and Mr. Treacy will give you more peace of mind.  Their success rate is 99%+ instead of 96% for less experienced surgeons.  I thought about going to one of them, but after reading "Dr. Bob Arnot aka Dr. Danger's" story about hip resurfacing in which Dr. Su was fully endorsed by one of the inventors of the BHR, I added that endorsement to my checklist before scheduling surgery.

[BHRfootballer]

Just Like to Say thank you to everyone who replied....wow what a boost!!!

You all may or not be be aware here in the UK we have what's Called the NHS -National Health Service, I'm not that fortunate to be able to choose my surgeon, as i fall under the NHS ( I can't afford to go Private) and i hear you all shout in a combined voice " but you CAN'T afford not to"

It's not that simple- i wish it was. My finances are stretched beyond belief. With no family to fall back on its difficult.

I implied that my Surgeon was the best in the area, with the following words( at least that's what i've been told)
I've spoken to All his peers at some point over the last 5 Months including The surgeon in question. He's a fine surgeon by all accounts- Even my GP has praised him.
Having had a Long Chat with him he made it clear there was nobody else with his ability to perform this operation in the South East Counties. My own GP has confirmed this, i've been with My GP for the past 12 years and got to know him well due to general sickness issues and injuries to my Kids. I trust him.

I'm not sure which system is best- the American or the UK System? All i know is i'm in good hands.

I have to say this also- its been a pleasure to befriend this community, what a bunch of really nice people!!! kind of restores your belief in Humanity, maybe a bit over the top but the responses i received certainly gave me a lump in throat- yes i know its my adams apple ( non technical name).

Right, i'll post another set of comments soon seeing the days seem to be just falling away ever getting closer.......

Thanks again ALL

[Pat Walter]

   Glad we could be there for you.  That's what this group is all about.  We will be waiting for updates and sometime in the future, you can give another nervous patient a pep talk when you have a shiny new hip.

Good Luck.

Pat

[obxpelican]

You sound like you have things totally covered, your doctor sounds very competent.  Keep in mind even if you only had an inexperienced surgeon you would have only raised your numbers a few percentage points, so if it goes from 1% to 3% problems that's 3 times, right?  But it's still only a 3% failure rate.

From now on forget about failure, only think of how great it will be to wake up knowing it's over and you'll be walking without pain soon after that, when I woke up it was the first time in a number of years that I had no pain at all.

Chuck

Just Like to Say thank you to everyone who replied....wow what a boost!!!

You all may or not be be aware here in the UK we have what's Called the NHS -National Health Service, I'm not that fortunate to be able to choose my surgeon, as i fall under the NHS ( I can't afford to go Private) and i hear you all shout in a combined voice " but you CAN'T afford not to"

It's not that simple- i wish it was. My finances are stretched beyond belief. With no family to fall back on its difficult.

I implied that my Surgeon was the best in the area, with the following words( at least that's what i've been told)
I've spoken to All his peers at some point over the last 5 Months including The surgeon in question. He's a fine surgeon by all accounts- Even my GP has praised him.
Having had a Long Chat with him he made it clear there was nobody else with his ability to perform this operation in the South East Counties. My own GP has confirmed this, i've been with My GP for the past 12 years and got to know him well due to general sickness issues and injuries to my Kids. I trust him.

I'm not sure which system is best- the American or the UK System? All i know is i'm in good hands.

I have to say this also- its been a pleasure to befriend this community, what a bunch of really nice people!!! kind of restores your belief in Humanity, maybe a bit over the top but the responses i received certainly gave me a lump in throat- yes i know its my adams apple ( non technical name).

Right, i'll post another set of comments soon seeing the days seem to be just falling away ever getting closer.......

Thanks again ALL

[BHRfootballer]

Hi All,

I'm totally knackered today! just sat down to read the posts and all of a sudden its dawned on me what i've done today.

I've interview the last of the short listed applicants for MY JOB!!!
My Boss has offered me a better position within the company, more of a desk job come sales/ warehouse Manager.....great  i thought, but the physical side of the job is what i like.....now i have a younger ( not so better  looking lol) co worker, my days of humping and dumping are kind of over, less stress on the body- thank god for small mercy's.
But yet again there is a positive here and its hard not to see the negative, i'm trying to build up the PMA you Americans talk about, we call it the " stiff upper lip" show no signs of weakness, grin and bare it......what a load of Tosh.
I know i should feel good about what i've achieved today, but it feels like i've just thrown myself on the scrap heap to do a boring desk job- not unlike a Pro footballer turning to a commentary position just so he can be near the action but not get involved, ....i don't think i'm making it clear what i'm trying to convey.

I had my first meeting today with my Orthapeadic therapist, ( sorry.... when you see all the Hospital programs on Tv  you know Documentaries/ dramas there's always beautiful nurses around every where, there's been a malfunction in the Nurse Creation department here in the Norfolk) Man she was scary and as she explained what's expected of me on the day of my admission she hit home with some home truths about what's going to happen to me- how i'll feel- what i will not be allowed to do ( NO MORE FOOTBALL FOR ME ) that's a killer, the do's & don'ts came and went in a blur....the sound in my head was NO MORE FOOTBALL FOR ME-NO MORE FOOTBALL FOR ME.

Is that right? will i not be able to  do impact sports? i was under the impression after time served going through a long rehabilitation period you can go back to what you like doing, football was ..sorry is my life, i was within a shout of making it to a professional level back in the late 80's & 90's only to be dropped like the proverbial hot coal and ended up playing in the lower leagues. Still it was fun.

I have a phone call interview booked with my surgeon later next week to ask more questions, the likes of ;

Are you going to make me shorter then i already am? Lol no just jesting.
Can i play competitively at Football / Squash/Golf ....you know where i'm going with this!
How much of a difference has a new hip helped in the physical side of your relationship? Lisa & i have enjoyed a healthy sex life over the past 18 years although i've suffered greatly recently for my actions so to speak, Lisa has voiced her concerns which in turn has had a dramatic impact on our physical relationship...I'm no Stud muffin but a very happy man, i guess what i'm asking is, has this operation had a  detrimental effect on your relationships and if so how?

My look at the time ... i need some ZZZZZzzzz big time, off to bed peeps catch you all soon.

Best wishes

Stu

 

[BHRfootballer]

Hi All & (PAT)

Pre Operation check up completed today;
X rays- therapist x 2 - doctors - two nurses and anesthetist.
Bloods to be done next Tuesday ready for blood transfusion if required.

Told today i have to be a good boy and no weight baring on my left leg for two weeks by a Doctor( who's leaving the Department today )  who's advice totally contradicts my Surgeon.....Go Figure!... me thinks a phone call is in order To Dr Cohen my surgeon.
 
For those who know me Football has played a large part in my life, according to the Doctor today that's a no go area what so ever- but on all of the websites i've trawled through including this one they state  " you can go back to a what you like doing sport wise, given  enough time for recovery and on the advise of your surgeon" 
So according to the geezer today Squash / Badminton or any physical sport is OUT, what the hell lol ..at least i'll be able to put my left sock on and tie up my left shoe lace without cursing....... Yipeeeee( i have tamed down the comment for the US readers) the original comment was a little too colorful....

So i read all the good things as instructed ( @OBxpelican) and all i see is people resuming their passion for their chosen sport, I mean there are BHR sports people in here they can't be wrong, i've seen the Films & the photo's ... their happy to be competing some of them, I need to be back playing the sport i love , if not at a competitive level then for fun which includes teaching my son. But who do i believe??

Although i'm anxious about the next few weeks, i'm relatively calm and together about going in for the operation & my planned recovery time, of which has been tweaked by the Surgeons today( as well,  Something of which i need to speak to my Boss about.)

The actual time in Hospital for those 3 to 6 days is the problem - I'm Sh*****g myself to put it mildly.

Looking forward to all  the attention at home though..lol .... love you Lisa!!!  frothy coffee's  & Cuddles what more could a Man want.
Well actually  the 40" LED Panasonic 1080 HD ready &  the surround sound System to play my X -box games would be good.... what a big Kid!

[DirkV]

Hi Stuart,
Best wishes. I know I received some medical advice from nurses and an attending physician and physical therapist who didn't know about capabilities of hip resurfacing, as opposed to THR (probably small-ball THR at that). Some of those medical professionals gave restrictions that contradicted my surgeon's advice of no real limitations. I think it's inherent when you get the latest, state of the art implant, that people don't know what the limitatations are. In a sense, I think we're guinea pigs. When I asked my surgeon about playing hockey (goalie), he said he thought that would be fine, but he didn't know of anyone yet doing that. So he said, yes, but then asked to let him know how it goes :-) .
As more years pass with people with HR implants, the data is collecting to show the benefits and longevity, but it's still relatively new. I would think you could find surgeons to comment in general for a healthy person of your age, with no other medical problems that you would be able to play football (soccer to me :-) ). Of course, maybe your surgeon knows something about your bone health or something else, so you would be better listening to a medical professional that knows about you than an old hockey goalie who has been hit in the head too many times.
But that said, I would share your mindframe that an otherwise healthy person should be able to play soccer after HR.
I know that personally, I play street basketball with my 17 yr old son, have played hockey, have ridden in 110 mile bike race, and much more with 2 resurfaced hips.

Oh and it's great when you can cut your toenails and tie you shoes again...you'll get that back, but if you are like me you won't ever really take it for granted. People will think you are weird when you get a grin tying your shoes.

Best wishes,
-Dirk

[connie2858]

I just want to say that I am 3 months post-op (BHR on my right hip) and my emotions were all over the place (still are sometimes).  Every little improvement is a confidence boost, but then it would seem as though I would over do it and regress a little in my progress.  Finally on Mar 9 my doctor released all limitations and I am swimming again and slowly trying other things, (working on crossing my legs).  I don't think anyone can know the depression and elation, ups and downs that we go through unless you experience it and even then we all have different reactions.

This forum has helped me through all of the craziness and although I have been a turtle at getting better I would always find hope here in everyone's posts.  What's most important is that we will all get through this even though at different rates and pain levels.  I was so envious when I would read that people had not had pain medication since day 2 or whatever.  I still take pain meds a couple of times a day and I feel sore often.  My back has been killing me and I have been given muscle relaxers for that, which help me sleep all night!  My doctor assures me that this is all very normal and will clear up in time, that because of learning to walk correctly again my back is feeling the strain, so I am trying to be patient.  I know that one day soon, this will all be a distant memory and I'll be pain free again.  When I look back at the 1st few days post-op I can see the progress that I have made in leaps and bounds.  Really 3 months is a relatively short period of time.  We all just need to hang in there together and help each other when we can.

[Pat Walter]

Hi Connie

Glad to hear things are getting better for you.  It just takes time, more for some as you are experincing.  Sometimes people hit plateaus and all of a sudden leap forward.  You might find that at some point you find you are doing much better at certain things.  YOu still have healing to do, but it should be getting easier and easier as you have found.

Keep in touch and let us now how you are doing.  Some people take many months to a year to do some things like tying shoes or even crossing their legs.  Be gentle in pushing yourself - it will come eventually.

Pat

[BHRfootballer]

Hello Connie & Dirk,

Thanks for the G up Dirk, Like your comment "People will think you are weird when you get a grin tying your shoes" i lool forward to that rye smile beaming from my face.

To Connie
My thoughts are with you and thanks for taking the time to comment on my thread, leave us a wee note now and again, keep us informed i promise to do the same.

There's loads of really nice people in here, i've even been contacted by one gentleman here in the UK, we've not spoken as yet ( passing ships and all) just knowing people CARE makes a difference.

All the best to you both, Connie & Dirk

Regards to you all.

Stuart