Depression

[rubyred]

Hi guys,

I know this section is for post-op emotional issues, but I wasn't sure where else to post this. Please feel free to move to a more appropriate area 

This could be long winded, so please bear with me...

I've been in pain for a little over 2 years. At first the pain was bearable... pop a couple of painkillers and i'd be fine to get on with my activities. However since recieving 2 lots of pain injections and an arthroscopy in my left hip, there are days where I can barely move without breaking down in sobs because of the stabbing, catching pain in my groin.

I used to be a very active, sociable young woman in her late twenties. I ballroom danced 3 times a week, swam and attended the gym regularly, was learning to drive, went dancing with my friends etc... I've had to stop all of it due to the constant pain.

I've become somewhat of a hermit in my home through no fault of my own. I literally go to work and come home to lay on my bed as that's all I can manage. Even bending down to put on my socks and shoes is so painful. So hard to believe that I was dancing the Jive about 18 months ago 

As you can manage i've sunk into depression. Crying myself to sleep most nights as I can't believe i'm living like this. I've been passed on by 2 surgeons already saying i'm a lost cause and none of their words did much to help reassure my mental state.

My final hope is seeing Mr Treacy on 19th October. I'm really hoping he can help where others have failed.

I'm not sure why i'm writing this. I guess it just helps getting it out there, rather than having it in my head!

Thanks for reading.

[Luanna]

Hi Ruby,
I'm so sorry to hear that you are having such a tough time. Sure hope the Mr. Treacy can help fix the hip so that your pain goes away and you can get back to an active life. Nothing more depressing that not being able to do the things that you love and want to do.

Do you have a group of people nearby or family who can provide emotional support? I was very upset when my hip feel completely apart on me and went to a person who was skilled at counseling and helping me cope and getting ready for surgery. My friends were good too but they didn't understand as they are all fit and able to do whatever they please.

There are a lot of supportive people on this site. Please keep posting.

Luanna

[Pat Walter]

Ruby

You have come to the right place for some moral support and understanding.  We all know the pain of hip problems and how it stops our active lives.  It is easy to become depressed when we can't be the people we want to be.  When you can only sit instead of dancing, walking, riding a bike, skiing, skating, playing tennis, golf, etc etc.  It is tough. 

No one is beyond help for their hips. The problem as you found out is to get one of the best surgeons in the UK to help you.  Reguardless of the solution being a resurfacing, a THR or even a hip fusion - a top surgeon can help you.  Mr. Treacy is one of them.  Hopefully, it will happen soon.  Mr. McMinn is also one of the top surgeons in the UK.  You can also turn to him.  Dr. De Smet of Belgium will give you a free email consultation if you write to him with your story and a copy of your x-rays in a digital format. 

I had to use my credit cards to go to Dr. De Smet in Belgium in 2006 for my resurfacing.  I could have received an old fashioned THR here free, but knew I wanted to be active again without restrictions.  So I spent $18,000 to get to Belgium.  Since then I have learned what miracles these top surgeons can perform.  There will be a solution. 

Pleae continue to post and keep in touch.  We all look forward to the time you tell us what can be done for you.  We will read your posts and keep our fingers crossed for you.  I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Pat

[Boomer]

Ruby,

If you really are suffering from depression, make an appointment with a mental health care professional. The folks on this website can give you lots of information, personal stories and emotional support but that is no substitute for what a mental health care professional can do for you. Don't try to tough it out alone. You need your sleep and a normal life while you get through this process.

Boomer

[Luanna]

Yes. I totally agree with Boomer. I was very distraught and getting help from professional counselors and even a psychiatrist really helped. It doesn't mean that you are weak or lacking in character if you seek professonial help during this difficult time.

Take care and keep posting.

Luanna

[rubyred]

Thank you everyone. Your words are so kind 

I actually start seeing a counsellor this Tuesday, so i'm hoping that the very least I can learn some coping techniques until the worst passes.

[obxpelican]

Ruby,

Things will change when you get that hip fixed, it's very disturbing to go from being very active to becoming a hermit.  Nobody around you probably understands what you're going through, but most of us around this forum have a good idea.

What's positive is that you are talking about it, albeit on an Internet forum.


Chuck

[Lopsided]

Ruby, resurfacing is where you get your life back. You can think of it as an opportunity. A well placed resurfaced hip - especially if done by a renowned surgeon like Mr. Treacy - should feel better and more responsive than a natural hip. I am sure you will be ballroom dancing again, and would like to see pictures too.

D.

[Luanna]

Hi Ruby,
Checking in to see how you are doing. How did your counseling session go? Hope today is a reasonably good day for you.

Luanna

[rubyred]

Hi Luanna,

Thank you for asking

I've yet to go to my counselling. It's in an hour. I think it'll be good just to vent about things...

Pain wise today has been awful.... i've lost count at the amount of pain killers i've had to take, still I see Mr Treacy tomorrow morning 

[Dannywayoflife]

Ruby,
       Just seen that your appointment is tomorrow! Good luck for that! I'm sure it will end with a good out come for you.
I know how you feel I'm roughly the same age as your self and this has ruined my life.
How ever there's an end in sight for me.
If you want please feel free to Pm me I'm a good listener.
Atb Danny

[Tin Soldier]

Rube - I feel for you.  I think I had been in a similar but not as extreme place as you and I think being the type to want to fix stuff, I focused on gettting a treatment.  That kept me busy, which is a good thing your mental state.  In a few months after being diagnosed with OA, I decided that HR was the remedy and spoke to a few surgeons and then finally set a surgery date after I had enough.  It might be a faster process in the US with regards to insurance.  So I'm probabaly not helping much, but I think if you can try remember that this is a holding pattern until you get surgery then maybe that will help you.  I've read great things about Treacy, no doubt someday soon you'll be on the road to recovery.  Actually, you already are, by seeing someone about you mental state, by posting here, and by seeing one of the best surgeons in the world.  Hang in there.

[daylily]

Hi Ruby,
I sincerely hope you get some answers at your appointment and hopefully there will be an end to the pain for you.
((((((gentle hugs)))))))
Please keep us updated.
x

[rbt2011]

Ruby,
I hope your appointments went well.  Sorry to hear you are having such a rough time.  Glad to see you are getting some help for it. 

Not sure if it helps but there are a lot of people like you on this site in very similar circumstances.  Even better is that there are even more on this site that used to be where you are at and have since gotten a procedure that made their lives much, much better.  Hang in there.  There is hope, I promise.

[rubyred]

Thank you all for the lovely, kind replies.

For those who haven't read my other post, details of what happened at my appointment are here...

http://surfacehippy.info/hiptalk/index.php?topic=2823.0

[Luann]

Hi Ruby,

 Oh! You are so normal!!! You need to know many, if not all of us, went through this to some degree. I remember crying, not sleeping at night, extreme depression. I used to make my living as an athlete! Before my sx, I could barely walk more than 100 feet! I took 13 Advil a day "boosted" it with half a Vicoden per "serving"! It was scary. Now I don't even think about my hip anymore. I am loving life again! Your depression is only human. I am so glad you are getting help. Get the ball rolling with your HR or THR Dr and get your life and love of life back! Good Luck!!! Please continue to let us know how things are going!  Lu

[rubyred]

Thanks Lu

I've been in this pain for over 2 years, although it seems I still have a way to go to get pain free. So hard to keep upbeat.

[hernanu]

Hi ruby, as everyone mentions, there is nothing wrong with being down because your life has become painful and limited. The good thing that you can take heart from is that you're taking positive steps, dealing with excellent doctors and are addressing your problem. You'll learn about what is causing your pain, then have a plan for dealing with it. It doesn't lessen the pain, but maybe if you have a strategy for it, it will help with the emotional pressure.

I think the part that we recognize, even though those around us may not, is how emotionally draining pain can be. Along with the pain is the perception of losing control over life; well, now you are taking steps to take that control back.

I was in pain for a good five years and I can tell you there were many times I felt hopeless, but a large part of that was that I could not for the life of me figure out what was wrong. The HR came as a relief, even before the procedure, since I felt there would be an end to this.

You're doing good things, be kind to yourself and let your you and your hip team figure out what's up.

[Boomer]

Ruby,

As so many other posters have already said, we've all been in a similar state to where you are. We've all cried, begged for a miracle to make the pain go away, used pain killers to get through one day at a time. Eventually, we find someone (family, friends, psychiatrist) to help with the mental distress, and then we get someone to help with the physical problem. It just takes a long time to get everything in order.

I couldn't get up the stairs on Sunday, and told my wife I didn't think I could make it to my surgery date of Novermber 30th. Not a pretty sight. She talked me through it, as she has done so many times when I think I am losing my mind. Stay close to those who love you, and let them help you through. Stay posted and let us help you as well. We're all in this together. We share good and bad stories every day.

Feel better.

Boomer

[rubyred]

Things have taken a slightly bad turn.

This past Friday, I fell down about 5 stairs, landing flat on my tail bone, aggrivating my already sore left hip.

After being taken to hospital, and re-xrayed, i've stretched a joint between the tailbone and hip Not much they can do for it, other than refer me for some physiotherapy which I start today.

These things are set to try us...