Depression

[Dannywayoflife]

The NHS has a funny tendency for screwing up! They totally lost my origional x rays from when i first had symptoms with my hip

[Spanielsal]

Oh Ruby, torture by barbaric NHS. Feel for you. Hope the pain is subsiding xxxx

[Dee Dee]

Ruby,
I know what you went through with the dye injection.  The dr kept trying to get the fluid into the joint space and the pressure was horrid.  I thought I would jump off the table. he finally stopped before he could inject the whole amount and said he "got enough " in to proceed to MRI.  I had to walk down the hall in all that pain.  Then the stupid MRI tech said I did not need to remove my pants, just let them bunch at my feet for the whole time I was in the machine.  It was degrading and so uncomfortable.

I did not get any pain relief from the injection.  In fact my pain went up, my hip started popping( never did that before) and my rom went down after the arthrogram injection.

The good news was the MRI finally proved the damage to my hip that some of my ortho doctors would not acknowledge from just X-rays.  I had a large labral tear, cysts and cartilage damage.  I had proof that my hip was damaged and my Local ortho still did not want to talk surgery.

Thank God for my PT.  She new about dr. Gross and referred me to him. He saw mild dysplasia, severe oa and recommended HR just from the X-rays.  It is so good to have an experienced dr. and the information on this site to help.  Have you visited hipchicks online?  Many of them have had poa's for dysplasia.

Praying that you get answers and relief soon. 

_________________________________
Right HR with Dr. Gross. 5-23-12

[rubyred]

Ruby,
I know what you went through with the dye injection.  The dr kept trying to get the fluid into the joint space and the pressure was horrid.  I thought I would jump off the table. he finally stopped before he could inject the whole amount and said he "got enough " in to proceed to MRI.  I had to walk down the hall in all that pain.  Then the stupid MRI tech said I did not need to remove my pants, just let them bunch at my feet for the whole time I was in the machine.  It was degrading and so uncomfortable.

I did not get any pain relief from the injection.  In fact my pain went up, my hip started popping( never did that before) and my rom went down after the arthrogram injection.

The good news was the MRI finally proved the damage to my hip that some of my ortho doctors would not acknowledge from just X-rays.  I had a large labral tear, cysts and cartilage damage.  I had proof that my hip was damaged and my Local ortho still did not want to talk surgery.

Thank God for my PT.  She new about dr. Gross and referred me to him. He saw mild dysplasia, severe oa and recommended HR just from the X-rays.  It is so good to have an experienced dr. and the information on this site to help.  Have you visited hipchicks online?  Many of them have had poa's for dysplasia.

Praying that you get answers and relief soon. 

_________________________________
Right HR with Dr. Gross. 5-23-12

My hip has always 'clicked' for as long as I can remember, but now it 'pops' too and following the pop I get a surge of pain radiating from my groin down my thigh. Horrendous. I too had to hobble from one room to another, but the worst bit was trying to get off the bed to begin with! Thank the lord for the nurse that was there to hold me up.

I know for sure I have cysts, damaged cartilage and perhaps another tear, Mr Treacy diagnosed that, but my OA is just not severe enough yet :(

[rubyred]

Having a rough few days. Emotionally and physically.

My GP put me on Zopiclone sleeping pills about 6 weeks ago as I've been unable to sleep naturally due to hip pain. I literally was only getting 2-4 hrs a night if I was fortunate. The Zopiclone have been wonderful for night rest... but it's come at a price :( Anxiety, paranoia, restlessness during the day and sometimes I feel 'hung over' during the day also.

Anyway, all the extra anxiety and paranoia has ruined the nice friendship I had going with my ex. He has his own stresses too and simply cannot handle mine. I have been over texting, analysing him etc :( Trouble was I was never like that before.... the pills have sent me crazy. Now, he won't talk to me and has no knowledge that it wasn't technically 'me' doing these things.

And now, my hip has just given way on the stairs... I fell down about 4 or 5 of them and just sobbed there, not bothering to get up.

Seriously, they wouldn't leave a dog in this much pain, let alone a human being.

[Spanielsal]

am thinking of you Ruby, you are right, this is barbaric.  Hang on to the certain knowledge that you will get treatment.  You might just need to see a Dysplasia specialist.  Johann Witt and Marcus Bankes both do NHS treatments in London.  You cannot go on like this, so you need some help and your GP is the person to take this on.  you can choose and book to see these guys - especially as you have a specialist condition.  Even if it is just a second opinion.  I know what you mean about the hangover, too many pills really do damage what is going on in our heads.  Try and focus not on your relationship but on healing yourself, on being kind to yourself and getting you the right support and help.  Has anyone sent you to a pain clinic?  am sending you lots of love and hugs, hang in there poppet... it will will will get better.  try and find something good to do for yourself every day.  Have you tried wheat bags draped on your hips? the warmth can sometimes help me.  Also, using a cushion at the back of a seat to increase the angle beyond 90* allows me extra time sitting.  xxxx

[rubyred]

am thinking of you Ruby, you are right, this is barbaric.  Hang on to the certain knowledge that you will get treatment.  You might just need to see a Dysplasia specialist.  Johann Witt and Marcus Bankes both do NHS treatments in London.  You cannot go on like this, so you need some help and your GP is the person to take this on.  you can choose and book to see these guys - especially as you have a specialist condition.  Even if it is just a second opinion.  I know what you mean about the hangover, too many pills really do damage what is going on in our heads.  Try and focus not on your relationship but on healing yourself, on being kind to yourself and getting you the right support and help.  Has anyone sent you to a pain clinic?  am sending you lots of love and hugs, hang in there poppet... it will will will get better.  try and find something good to do for yourself every day.  Have you tried wheat bags draped on your hips? the warmth can sometimes help me.  Also, using a cushion at the back of a seat to increase the angle beyond 90* allows me extra time sitting.  xxxx

Hi Sal,

I find that laying or sitting on my bed, with a pillow under my left buttock helps some whilst i'm watching TV or whatever, plus ice on my hip joint works for a time.

I'm going to wait until I have Mr Bache's opinion following the CT scan and see what he says. If he says no to a PAO then I have spoken with Mr O Hara's private secretary and she told me that if he cannot perform a PAO for whatever reason then he'll perform a HR or a THR. Maybe there's hope yet...

[Spanielsal]

I'll keep it all crossed for you! x

[Anna]

“When the world says, “Give up,” Hope whispers, “Try it one more time.” â€" Anonymous

[hernanu]

Ruby, here's hoping that one of these turns out well for you. If its an HR, I can vouch for its efficacy, so as many good wishes as possible from me to you. Keep at it, I feel things will come good for you.

[rubyred]

I thought I'd add to my old thread here, rather than open a new one.

I know what i'm about to say will sound awful. I really do not mean it to, but I cannot help how i'm feeling either. My mood has been incredibly low for about 3 weeks now. I was feeling so positive for about a week before and after surgery, so happy and excited for my new life that was about to start, but as I began to realise just how long of a journey this was going to be and as good as BHR's are, they are not an instant fix. The pain of my recovery so far has been up there, on a few occasions, with how I was pre-op... sometimes surpassing it.

There has been a few times where I will just sit in my shower and sob because of the lack of independence and dignity. Having to have my mother help me in and out of the shower tub, help me in and out of bed, putting my underwear on  :'( This may sound all so trivial, and perhaps it is in the grand scheme of things, but for me this is how I was before I had surgery and I was naive to think it would be different straight away.

I long to have my life back. I'm dying to get back to work. To see people and be sociable. Most of my family haven't bothered to come and see me and that has really upset me. I know there are many people who haven't even had surgery and are in pain and I know how lucky I am, that's why I feel bad for feeling as blue as I am  :(

[Mike D]

Hi Ruby
I'm sorry you feel so low. Nothing that you've said is trivial though, they are real issues because they are affecting you and bringing you down.
If I had gone through my early recovery without the help of my wife and son, I'm  certain I'd feel the same.
Having someone to lean on is a great thing.
I've only had odd days of pain that were anything like pre-op pain so to have the level of pain you describe would get to anyone, Ruby.
Are you still on the codeine painkillers? If not, can you get another weeks supply and see how that goes?
If you think the pain is too much, get back in touch with Mr T's team and see what they say about it, I would.
Also, not long to the 6 week follow up so you'll be x-rayed and can talk to the main man.
Stay positive Ruby-you've been resurfaced by one of the best surgeons in the world.

[kamoynsgi]

Hi Ruby

Post surgery is an emotional time generally.  You've been through a lot.  I think that we probably make allowances for ourself in the first few weeks but expect to see wonders by about this point post op.  I get a bit frustrated as well when I have a setback or experience pain that was not there yesterday.  Being at home and recovering means that the world has shrunk a bit so problems can appear magnified beause there is less there to distract you. 

Don't feel bad about still needing help - it is early days -better to have the help and recover properly in the long run.  Not long until your post op appointment and I'm sure that the re-assurance you get there will lift you as well as the support you get from your friends here.

Ka

[Spanielsal]

Hey Ruby

I'm so sorry you are feeling so blue. You need to get your dignity back for sure, that will help. Practially, i hope this mad description will hlp: Dressing is still tricky for me but I've found that I can get a sock on by resting my op side foot behind me (bent at the knee and I'm facing away from the bed) with the foot resting on the bed, I can get the sock over my toes. Then I can twist the other way with the foot still bent up towards my bum, and pull it up. I do the same sort of manoeuvre for underwear doing the operated side first, hanging the loop of the first leg hole behind me then sitting to get the other side on. Initially I used the grabber to put 'em on but have found bent leg behind easier.

From your post on the other thread you are way ahead of me, walking upstairs like a normal person! I still do the one stair shuffle.

It's a slow process and I was trying to explain it to someone else, to me it's kind of like climbing a really big hill. You have to stop every so often and see how far you've come. I guess I'm blessed with lower expectations. My new hips are great fr pain relief but I never expected them to deliver me back to the same abilities as others with healthy hips so each time ive achieved something new I've had a moment of joy as I hadn't expected to do that.

It's not easy to accept the limitations particularly after such a swift deterioration, but you will get back to it, you got a Birmingham hip, the very best invention in hip terms, you have the best chance of the fullest recovery possible.

Take heart from your little steps and don't beat yourself up.  We are all with you all the way. Try my top tips, hope they work for you.

Sal

[rubyred]

I must sound so ungrateful. I don't mean to be.... and I'm truly not. I realise how close I was to having nothing done to me and just how close Mr T was to saying no to a BHR. It's just..... I don't know.... inpatience perhaps?

Ka's so right about how the world seems smaller than before so all the 'little' things are magnified 100%. I feel like i'm in my own little bubble and I'm unable to see the bigger picture clearly at the moment. It's a weird feeling and a little surreal.

I've even started to worry that when I do return to work that I won't have my old job to return to. That my replacement will be doing a better job and they will find me something else to do as they will prefer her. Crazy huh??? I swear having cabin fever drives you a bit nuts!!

To answer Mike's question, I came off all of the medication maybe a week or so ago. I was still on the paracetamol and Dihydracodeine 4 times a day up till then. I stopped because I wanted to see how my body would cope without - I guess not very well is the answer! I've started to re-take them again, but I hate being reliant on pills. I was popping them like Smarties pre-op!

[Spanielsal]

Aw Ruby, I didn't mean to make you feel bad, you are going through and have been through a very traumatic experience. Hardly anyone in your normal world will understand but we are here, all of us all the time. Let it out Ruby red, that's what it's for. All the pills make our minds spin, don't forget that lots of very sane very normal hippies ave experiences whopping depressions post op. it's not abnormal!  Kindness and gentleness to yourself are so important.

Also, boots the chemist are selling metatone vitamin tonic 3for 2, that will help enormously to boost your healing. Vitamin and mineral deficiency affects your brian as well as your body.

Take care

Sal xx

[rubyred]

Thanks Sal, I will look into getting some of that from Boots. I'll try anything  :) x

[Pat Walter]

Hi Ruby
I am sorry you are having a diffiucult time.  Many people do after surgery, it is not unusual.  That however, doesn't make it any easier.  If would be nice if you could get some meds from your family doctor, but I don't think that is easy for you to do in the UK.

Know you have support here.  We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.  Things will get better, just try to hang in there and try to think positive.

[rubyred]

Thank you Pat. Everyone here has been so kind. Truly warms my heart  :)

My family doctor has been wonderful up to the point of surgery. They have been careful not to just give me any medication, but they tried different combinations of drugs to help the pain. I'm not sure what they will do now i'm post-op... I actually have an appointment to see my family doc the day before my 6 week follow up with Mr Treacy so we'll see.

I guess I'm just needing some reassurance that all that i'm going through post-op, pain and depression wise, is all normal and will fade with time.

[Spanielsal]

Sorry to any Brian's out there ...... I meant Brain...... Clearly mine is on holiday!   ;D